I Think We Need Forgiving Standards

They say we're supposed to set high standards for ourselves.  All throughout our young lives we hear things like, "You deserve the best," "Shoot for the moon," "Never settle," or, "If at first you don't succeed, try and try again."  All of these sayings may not directly be associated with our 'standards' per say, but they all essentially say we deserve the best and should strive to be the best - all of which, I could not agree more with.  We're supposed to set goals and standards for ourselves that we want to accomplish and live up to.  That is our main duty to ourselves and others while we are here on this earth; to live our life to the best of our ability, and utilize the gifts God gave us the best way we know how.

Where I think we all kind of miss the boat is that we can't let ourselves set our personal standards we have, for others as well.  Often times we don't even meet our own standards!  Not that we don't try our very best, but if everyone was at their best all of the time we really wouldn't have any problems!  And though this may all sound very cliche I think it's something all of us often forget.  We forget that we must have forgiving standards.

So what do I mean by forgiving standards.  Well, during my short 19 years of life, what I've come to realize is that, often times when someone disappoints me, or disagrees with me, or does something that I wouldn't necessarily do myself or approve of, I tend to want to let them know.  Or if I don't want to let them know I just might distance myself or even act negatively toward them - some would call it, holding a grudge.  Especially if it's someone close.  We always expect our loved ones and close friends to be 100% reliable.  And they should be, right?!!  Well yes, to an extent.  We should surround ourselves by people who genuinely care for us, are there for us, and won't let us down when we need them.  But people aren't perfect, and we shouldn't expect them to be.  Do we have a right to feel hurt, upset, and confused by why on earth someone would do whatever it is or was to you or even themselves??  I would have to say yes, just because I think that's natural also.  The part I often have a hard time with though, is letting the person know or dealing with it myself, and then letting go.  Most of the time, if you choose to say something and can calmly express to someone close to you how they might have hurt you, they will apologize and things will slowly go back to normal.  If they don't apologize however it is often hard to deal with, and clearly things might not ever be the same.  Even still though, it is our job to forgive them to the best of our ability, know we've said our piece, and to let go.  I've been both the grudge holder, and the one the grudge is being held against.  I think we all have.  So knowing that, shouldn't we all realize no one will ever really measure up to our perfect standards and that we all have our flaws?  Easier said then done, I know.     

People who truly care for you should never actually mean to hurt you, but everybody makes mistakes.  A phrase I try to remember that I came up with/might have heard somewhere else, I'm not sure, goes like this:

"Be slow to trust, and quick to forgive."

We must strive to forgive in all circumstances, but we can choose who we give our hearts and trust to.  Always remembering that we are not perfect, we will let people down, people will let us down, and we all will let Him down.  So let's try and forgive, just as He does for us.